1st Grade Guidance Class- Tower of Trust

This is such a fun lesson because my students get such a kick out of how high they think they can build the "Tower of Trust" before it comes crashing to the ground.  I wish I would have gotten a picture of them and their nervous looking faces as I added brick by brick!

At the beginning of the lesson we talk about what the word trust looks like and 1st graders have EXCELLENT examples of how they can be trusted.  Some of them shared how they can go to a neighbor's house all by themselves to play with a friend, some said that they help their parents cook or bake, some shared how they help with farm and yard work, and some also shared how they have jobs they need to do at their homes and how they do them right away.  I had one little boy tell me that whenever his mom tells him to turn off his Nintendo DS, he turns it off right away, every. single. time.  (I wish I had that happening at my house!)

On index cards students either write or illustrate a way they can be trusted and then we get started by taping them to my big cardboard bricks and building a "Tower of Trust" (which must be said in a loud, ominous voice :).

We have a great discussion about how trust isn't given right away, it must be built brick by brick, behavior by behavior.  We then talk about how 1 negative behavior affects the tower of trust, and if that happens over and over again, what kind of mess we are left with when it comes crashing to the ground.

3rd Grade Guidance Class- Friendship Pie

In third grade I am encouraging students to think about what kinds of characteristics make good friends, and a great book to help get us thinking about this is, Enemy Pie by Derek Munson.  In this book a new boy moves into the neighborhood and becomes the narrator's #1 enemy.  Thankfully, his dad has an old recipe for Enemy Pie that helps get rid of them.  All that he must do is spend one entire day with the new kid, and then have enemy pie for dessert.  Soon, the narrator realizes that Jeremy Ross is actually a friend and that enemy pie is really delicious.

After reading the story, students we able to create their own "Friendship Pie" recipes using ingredients that make friendships delicious too!

Denver Defender Bulletin Board

Each month I try to add a new bulletin board to the hallway on the way to the cafeteria.  This month I am really focusing on ways that students can be a Defender (stand up for others) WITHOUT having to say much- or say anything at all.  Some kids think that they aren't bold enough to be a defender, but ANYONE can do it!

4th Grade Guidance Class- Reframing

I always start this lesson off by saying how excited I am to be able to teach my 4th graders a very "fancy" counseling word that I learned in my Master's program.  Kids think that this is pretty cool and get excited to learn a college word!

We then get started with learning about "reframing".  Being able to give a negative experience or conversation a positive spin, is a wonderful skill to have.  Students can begin to see the bigger picture in things that they are going through, and look at things through different lenses.

I read one of my very favorite stories, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst.  We then go through the book and work at reframing Alex's negative experiences from his day into something more positive.

Lastly, students work together in small groups to create a skit to perform to the class that displays reframing.  Examples that they have to choose from are: "My brother won't stay out of my room", "My parents won't let me go see the new scary movie", "I got an F on my test", "I didn't get what I wanted for my birthday", "I didn't get invited to the bowling party" or, "My friends wouldn't play with me at recess".  You can probably only imagine how much fun they have with this task!

5th Grade Guidance Class- Memory Banks

ON THE BOARD I WRITE:

“Our words and actions today create memories that will fill others’ memory banks tomorrow.”

Students are asked to think about acts of kindness, respect, or helpfulness that have taken place in the classroom recently.  Many students gave each other compliments on things that they have noticed.

Then I hold up the Memory Bank.  This represents the “memory bank” each of us has inside.  The things we say and do now will go into people’s memory banks, sometimes forever.

Students pair up and then are asked to think of a time they were treated in a mean way, sharing with their partner what happened and how it made them feel without using real names.  Then students are asked to think of a positive memory that’s stored in their memory banks of someone who was kind to them. 

Lastly, students think about their own place in other people’s memory banks.  I ask them how they would like to be remembered by others.

WE have the power to create positive memories of ourselves through kind words and actions.  If we treat someone in a hurtful or unkind way, how will we be remembered?

HAVE STUDENTS CLOSE THEIR EYES: IMAGINE IT IS 10 YEARS FROM NOW.  THE PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU NOW ARE REMEMBERING YOU BACK IN 5TH GRADE.  WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE THEM TO BE ABLE TO SAY ABOUT YOU?  HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE REMEMBERED BY THEM?

2nd Grade Guidance Class- Reputation

Second graders have been learning about what the word "reputation" means and how it is created.  At the beginning of this set of lessons, we look at a picture of a wolf and describe some of the words that come to mind right away.  Second graders say things like: "Hungry", "Scary", "He's going to eat me!", "Cute!" (strange boys), and "mean".  Some of them talk about stories where there is a wolf included- Little Red Riding Hood or The Three Little Pigs.  After they share these things, we talk about how this is the wolf's reputation.  It is "what he does over and over again that creates a picture in our minds about who he is".  

Then we look at a variety of different characters that either possess a positive reputation or a negative reputation, and the behaviors that are building that reputation.  Students do an excellent job of being able to pull out those negative and positive behaviors.  

Finally, we start to examine our own reputations more deeply.  I ask questions like, "What do you want to be known for?" "What are some behaviors that you are proud of that are forming your reputation?" "What are some behaviors that may be hurting your reputation?" Students are always very honest in their answers, I am also so impressed by this.  For example, I had one little boy tell me that he always blurts out at school, and he knows that when his teacher talks about him, that she could be saying that he is a "blurter".  Well, he doesn't want to be known as a "blurter", he doesn't want that to be in his reputation, and the beautiful thing about it is...WE CAN CHANGE!  

Just like with making a pizza, we can add different "toppings" onto our reputations.  If we want to be known as a kid who helps others, we do helpful behaviors.  If we want to be known as a person who is patient, we show patience.  Students then got the opportunity to make their own "reputation pizzas".  

Kindergarten: Self- Control

In Kindergarten Guidance class we have been learning about self- control.  One of my favorite teachers out there, Mr. Smith, also known as the Teacher Tipster, gave me a great idea to help Kinders learn about what self-control means. First, he blows some bubbles and, as expected, the kids go crazy popping them.  As adults we want to pop them too!  Then, he challenges them to NOT pop the bubbles even if one lands on the tip of their nose.  Then he says, "Do they want to pop them? Yes- big time. But are they going to pop them?  No way!" This is such a great way to introduce the concept of self-control and launch a discussion about stopping to think before you act.

This was so much fun, especially when I told my students that I was going to give them the "Double Bubble Trouble" treatment and they had to show Super Self- Control!  Some of them even sat on their hands and became like statues to make sure they did not pop those bubbles.  This lead to a great discussion about how we have super powerful brains that can control our behavior.

Below is a video of Teacher Tipster and his awesomeness:

After the bubble challenge, I then read the book, It's Hard to be Five by Jamie Lee Curtis and Laura Cornell.  This is a great book that helps students understand that they have power over their "control panels".  As kids get older, things become more challenging but also a lot more fun!

Lastly, we played a wonderful game to practice self-control: Simon Says.  

Kindergarten students loved this lesson and still request the "Double Bubble Trouble" treatment!

Elementary Guidance in September

We have been having a lot of fun in guidance class throughout the elementary classrooms.  Each class has been learning about what my job is all about through a wonderful "first aid kit" idea that I found at one of my favorite blogs- Savvy School Counselor.  Have I told you how much I love being able to share ideas with other school counselor colleagues?!! :)

My school counseling first aid kit was full of items that describe how I can help students at Denver Elementary.  Below is a list of items that were in the kit and why:

Band-Aid/ Gauze: I help heal hurts that we carry on the inside, heart-hurts.
Tissue: Any type of emotion is ok to show in guidance and in my office.  I talked about sadness and crying, but then also focused on when you are really angry.  Is that ok?  YES!
Padlock: I am a secret-keeper at school.  If you tell me something I will not share it with anyone else without your permission.  Now, if I feel you are in danger, because I love you, I may need to talk to others about ways to help you stay safe.
Ear buds:  I promise to always listen.
Snickers bar: It is such a treat to be able to spend time with you in guidance!  It is a treat for me, and I hope that it is a treat for you!
Life Saver: I can help you stay afloat.  I focused on worries with this one- those sticky "peanut-butter thoughts".  Helping kids with worries is one of my favorite topics.
Toothpicks: I can help students pick apart their problem.  Many times if you are feeling angry, there is another feeling of hurt that is hidden beneath the anger.
Star: I can help guide your way- will I take the steps for you?  No way!  But I will help you figure out the steps to take.
Cotton Balls: If you come to school and need a hug or compliment- I am your gal!

Thanks again Vanessa at Savvy School Counselor.  Denver students truly understand why I am here!

School Counseling Program Introduction

Welcome back to a new and exciting school year!  

My name is Mrs. Thilges (Til-jes).  Most kids call me Mrs. T..  My husband, Leo, and I have three children, Ethan who is 7 years old, Bennett who is 5 years, and a 3-year-old daughter named Alanna.  We live in Cedar Falls.  I graduated from the University of Northern Iowa in 2004 with my Master’s in Social Work and have added a school counseling endorsement to my license.  Before joining the Denver Cyclones in 2010, I served Maquoketa Valley, Starmont, and Edgewood-Colesburg districts as a school social worker from Keystone Area Education Agency for 6 years. 

Our family enjoys being outside together, camping and going on walks, playing games, spending time with our extended family, cooking and baking together, and watching movies.  Leo works at Veridian Credit Union in Waterloo as a senior loan officer and loves to golf and watch the Vikings, Iowa Hawkeyes and UNI Panthers play sports.  I enjoy drawing, making crafts, and reading.

WHAT IS AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL COUNSELOR?

An Elementary School Counselor is a Masters level certified school counselor who has acquired specialization in counseling children in the areas of academic achievement, personal growth, social development, and career awareness.  Here at Denver Community Schools, the school counselors often function as liaisons between home, school and the community to offer the best supports to each student. We also serve as active participants on all student support teams.

HOW DO ELEMENTARY SCHOOL COUNSELOR’S HELP?

A school counselors’ main role is to help each student by serving as a child advocate. In elementary school students begin to develop their academic self-concept and their feelings of competence and confidence as learners. Children at this age are beginning to develop a sense of self and confidence in their abilities. They are also building decision-making, communication and life skills, as well as acquiring attitudes toward school, work habits, peers, social groups and family. These different aspects of a child’s life begin to develop in the elementary years and serve as the foundation for future success in adulthood.  Our goal is to foster this growth by creating and implementing a comprehensive developmental school counseling program which enhances the knowledge, attitudes and skills that your child acquires in the areas of academic, personal, social, and career development.

ARE ELEMENTARY COUNSELORS IN THE CLASSROOM?

At Denver Schools we offer a comprehensive guidance program that includes a developmental curriculum for all of our students from Kindergarten to 8th grade. Throughout the school year, I present classroom lessons focusing on some of the following developmental issues: initiating and maintaining friendships, appreciating/celebrating diversity, stress management strategies, conflict resolution strategies, enhancing self- confidence and self-awareness, expressing feelings, empathy development, and goal-setting.  Through developmental lessons held once per cycle, students begin to comprehend and attain coping, social, problem-solving, and conflict resolution skills.

WHAT TOPICS/ISSUES DO ELEMENTARY COUNSELORS SEE IN COUNSELING?

Not only am I present for each student in every classroom; I am also available to students in a more private setting.  I may work with students in individual counseling or in small group counseling.  Individual concerns regarding home, school, or peer issues, may be discussed.  Common topics include: peer issues/conflict, worries, time-management, grief, family changes, transitions, and social skills.  I also offer groups on topics such as: transitioning to school, friendship/social skills, self-esteem, and changing families. Counseling groups vary and are conducted according to specific school needs.

HOW CAN A CHILD SEE THE COUNSELOR?

Students are taught how to self-refer at the start of each school year.  Students often refer themselves to the counselor by completing a form in their classroom (or by speaking with the counselor or teacher).  If your child talks to you about filling out a “referral” or making an appointment with Mrs. T., that is how they set up a time with me.  A concerned parent, peer, or teacher may also refer a student to the counseling office if they have a specific concern.  I often meet with students during lunch or recess and minimize missing learning time as much as possible.  Sometimes students are invited to a friendly “lunch bunch”.  Students enjoy this time to just share with me about what is happening in their lives.  Your child is not in trouble when he or she visits with the counselor.

DO COUNSELORS WORK WITH FAMILIES?

One of the most important roles of a school counselor is collaboration.  I believe strongly in working cooperatively with all of the key players in our students’ lives, specifically, parents and school staff.  We pride ourselves on the relationships that we develop with both our students and their families at Denver Elementary.  I am available to meet with parents as needed.  I am often invited to participate in parent/teacher conferences and I work alongside parents and school staff as part of the General Education Intervention (GEI) team. 

I am also available to you as a resource.  We understand that parents need information and support with the challenging job of raising children.  Therefore, we try to provide our families with information on topics that are pertinent to what they may be experiencing with their child.  We encourage you to call us with any questions or concerns you may have.  I hope that you have found this information helpful in understanding my role at school.

Emily Thilges

K-7 School Counselor

ethilges@denver.k12.ia.us

Welcome To My Blog!

I have had the opportunity to gain so much knowledge from other fabulous school counselors across the country due to their wonderful blogs and websites, so much so, that I decided to join the club!  On this blog I hope to share with you what I am doing in my district as a K-7th School Counselor.  This is a positive place where students, parents, and other educators can come and see what I am up to!